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Editorial Reflections by Hettie Buck

Aging can be challenging while considering the legacy we will leave behind.

I have strong intuition that has developed over my lifetime as a mother, Gramma and woman. No one can discount my heart, empathy, or knowing - following my 'gut instinct'. It's mine. I own it.  

You can't go back — only forward. Will we ever learn collectively? Not likely. We move at our own speed,  earn our life lessons individually, encounter our uniqueness one by one, experience by experience in this Life School Journey. Time marches, we tend to 'stroll' until the realization hits hard and fast that "time waits" for no woman, man or child, caught up in the everyday, arguing the differences instead of embracing, criticizing instead of lifting up, or condescending rather than honouring with respect. 

Some seem to forget that age, experience and gained wisdom is something to be treasured and that may be the most insulting and disrespectful ignorance in more than one way. 

First Nations culture teaches ultimate respect for elders, as they cherish the wisdom of those who have walked further ahead and capture the legacy of those footsteps through storytelling, history, cultural traditions and practical life skills.

To treat an elder without this degree of respect wasn't something on my radar until I began to be seen as a "senior" as the tides in my life experience have changed it's been somewhat surprising to realize we aren't always seen as wise for our years.  If I was honest with myself perhaps I should have anticipated this but why does it sometimes feel like a smack in the face instead of a place of honour as we age?

A respected friend close to my age asked me recently when discussing how fast life is passing now, "Do you feel invisible? I feel invisible now."

My heart raced answering, "Yes. I feel the same often. I feel I'm a kind of an observer now. I watch, listen and absorb more. My direction, guidance or input isn't as requested or needed. Often if asked as a courtesy for my input, I'm cut off or my opinion needs to be 'updated' by a newly enlightened expert far more informed. I embrace the new info, don't get me wrong, I love learning but being tolerated or condescended to is pretty insulting after this long investment of living life." 

She answered me with a matter of fact laugh. "It is what it is Het. We all get there sooner than later, it's inevitable. "

As a kid early on I loved listening to family history and recognized the desire to maintain our family legacy. I'm so thankful our children and grandchildren ask questions and love looking at the old photos while hearing the stories and envision where they've descended from.  

As we remember those who served to protect let us not forget those at home that kept the fires burning to maintain inviting homes to return to and those today who protect and serve in new ways, always at the ready to sacrifice time, labour and even risk their own safety to protect others.   

The message? May we honour each other as humans upon this planet we share and continue to hope for a peaceful, harmonious earth home for all. Not possible? Well I'll take care of my own backyard and hope for the best.